Tuesday, not my favorite day
Every week it’s all the same. I wake up on a Tuesday morning and think about the many reasons why I don’t want to go to work. Work isn’t until tonight, but my mind is filled with things I’d rather do than sleep in the afternoon to wake up in the evening and report for my first day at work for the week. Ugh.
I am so tired of complaining. So tired of just going through the motions. Yet every week (or is it everyday?), I complain. Yet every week I also resolve to stop complaining, and to give my job my very best. I do give my 98% to the job, but I still can’t help complaining about a regular job keeping my away from other things I’d rather do. I know everyone has those kind of days, but for me it’s an everyday thing. A constant struggle. And it’s just not healthy.
And today, Alfred isn’t around to cheer me up. He isn’t here to tell me why I should go to work. Or, why I shouldn’t.
Yesterday, while reading PS I Love You, I remembered something that Alfred said awhile back. He doesn’t want to grow old. He’s not afraid of getting old, he just doesn’t want to reach the stage where someone will have to take care of him full time. He doesn’t want to grow old enough to be needing incontinence supplies, if you know what I mean.
Anyway…
I saw an ad on the papers yesterday about a short course on baking in one of the culinary schools here. I forgot to read up on it yesterday so I just did today. My heart fell when I saw the tag price – 38000 pesos. I don’t have that money and I don’t want to ask for a loan from my parents because I have an outstanding loan with my brother for the condo improvements. A loan that I have currently no means to pay for. Ugh. I hope they schedule another batch for that class a few months from now. Maybe by then I’d be able to put together some money.
Speaking of money…
I’ve noticed that money’s been tight for me lately. It doesn’t have anything to do with the financial crunch that the whole world is experiencing. At work, team managers receive an incentive based on their team performance and we look forward to this every month. Since I moved accounts though, it’s like I’ve been robbed of that incentive. With my former account, I always get it and it was more than enough to reward my top agents and cover the payment for my housing loan. Now, it’s barely enough to buy treats for my team. That sucks. If I was still getting that incentive every month, I’d be so confident to ask my dad to loan me the money for the baking class and to promise to pay it back within the year. But I don’t.
Okay, this has really turned out to be a very negative post so let me end with something different…
Earth Hour is happening again on March 28th, 8:30 PM local time.
I’ll make sure we do this at home. And I’ll talk to my cousins and my grandpa so they’ll switch off their lights too.
I just don’t know how feasible this is going to be at work. Our peak hours are at night, and I am not sure management will agree to switch off the main floor lights even for just an hour. Our PC monitors will still be running anyway, and that generates enough light for me. Haha.
I also uploaded some pictures at DigitalMe, go check ’em out 🙂 I wonder when I’ll be able to catch up posting for my Project 365 at the rate I’m going. haha
March 18, 2009 @ 11:38 pm
Through this post, I really felt your emotions. I felt that way too, when I still had my regular job.
Since I started a freelancing career, I never felt this “work” struggle again.
March 19, 2009 @ 11:31 am
Y’know what, with the time I spend online everyday (afterwork) I’ve been thinking about the many opportunities to earn online, just not sure which one is really for me. And takot lang din talaga ko bumitaw sa regular job. Pero sana I muster up the courage soon.