Newbie Wife

The husband and I met and fell in love in 2000 but got married only on the special day 12-13-14. We know everything about each other, and surely know what we’re getting into, right? How does finally getting married change things? What happens now that we are legally recognized as husband and wife?

There are sure to be many challenges ahead of us, and being a Newbie Wife isn’t going to be easy. Let the journey to wedded bliss unfold!

Good Friday at The Infinity Tower Suites

The Guevara-Apitanas have a family tradition – spending Holy Week at the Guevara home in Jose Panganiban, Camarines Norte and participating in the Holy Wednesday procession of saints with their very own San Andres dressed, lit up, and surrounded by a sea of flowers. I had the privilege of taking the trip with the family and spending the hot but happy few days of Holy Week the summer before we got married, but I have yet to go back. We thought it would be this year, but we weren’t so lucky. Work obligations didn’t permit the husband to take a long vacation so we had to make our own plans. My side of the family also couldn’t get away, so it was really just the two of us. 

Thanks to Deal Grocer, we found a discount voucher for a night’s stay at a one-bedroom suite at the Infinity Tower Suites. All our asks checked out – a pool, separate living area and bedroom, fully equipped kitchen. The hotel is in Makati, which we could reach traffic-free on a Good Friday. I called the hotel before purchasing the voucher to confirm availability on our check in date. I wouldn’t have had to do it normally, but we had a very specific date in mind (Good Friday), and it was four days away when I made the purchase. As soon as I got my voucher number, I called them back and made the reservation official. 

On our way to the hotel, we realized that the vet where we leave the dogs to room and board while we go on vacation was closed for Lent. Even another pet hotel we checked out wasn’t available anymore. The website showed no pet policy so I called the hotel and was gladly informed that they can make an exception for us jut this visit – we could definitely check in with our two dogs! Though we didn’t have to bring our pets after all, it was nice to know that the hotel could make such accommodations for us. That’s a huge plus for the establishment. 

Waze showed us the way to Infinity Tower Suites, although I had to ask the staff out front where the parking entrance was (on the other side of the building). Check-in was a breeze. We were instructed to bring a print out of the voucher but I had no access to a printer and they accepted the digital copy I showed them off my phone. Our suite was at the 12th floor and though the furnishings were quite dated, we loved how spacious the rooms were. Just like every other time we are in hotels, we kept imagining what we’d do with the space if it were our home own home. There were double sliding doors that led from the living room to the bedroom. There was plenty of space for a craft area and computer area before you reach the bed. They could also convert an area to a good-sized walk-in closet. It was really just a very big room. 


Right away, we felt like throwing a party! I messaged my friends saying they were welcome to drop by. I even extended the invite to our family in case anyone could make it. As expected though, everyone else had their own plans and we had the place all to ourselves. 

We reserved the visit to the pool and gym area until after dinner. Good decision, the place was deserted!


Just like the room though, the pool area could use some updating. The pool was only 4 ft deep and the water was very cold. They also probably prepared for a lot of guests because it smelled heavily of chlorine. The water in the jacuzzi was a bit warmer than the pool’s but it too was cold. 

There seemed enough equipment at the gym and both the hubby and I went on the bike and treadmill for a few minutes each. Mostly though, we just had fun. 

The hotel didn’t have a restaurant so there was no room service, but overnight accommodations included breakfast the The Wholesome Table located at the ground floor of the building. Food was good. There is a separate menu for hotel guests so be sure to ask for the regular menu if you’d like to order additional dishes/drinks. The pancakes I had wasn’t enough to satiate my hunger (we were considering it brunch) so I asked if they had fruit or fruit shakes but I guess the waitress misunderstood me because she said no. I asked for a regular menu and ended up ordering a grilled cheese sandwich. I would have just been okay with a fruit shake though, which were apparently available but were on a different beverage menu. So I ended up being very full having had the pancakes, grilled cheese sandwich, and a fruit shake. The husband had a rice meal plus his own refreshing fruit shake. The restaurant deserves its own review. The decor felt very organic but my phone had no battery so sorry, no photos. We also had celebrity sightings!

Overall, it was a good overnight staycation. Just what we needed after months of focusing on just work. We spent the rest of the weekend with friends at another staycation as if one was not enough to recharge for another long stretch at work. ūüôā

Impromptu Road Trip

When I ask the husband what he would like to do for the weekend, he would be hard-pressed for an answer. We hardly go to the malls anymore, and we hardly ever go to see movies in the cinema these days. We’ve even missed the Batman-Superman movie, as well as the more recent Civil War.

Lego_Badong

Happy with his purchase

Sometimes, he would tell me of an errand he needs done and he would like for me to drive him. Such was the case for Sunday, 15th of May. We were to head to SM San Lazaro where he’s to meet up with a Lego seller, and then drive all the way to Pasay for a brief visit to his parents. I stay in the car for both stops. It’s faster for him to go in and out of the mall with just one objective. If I go with him, we’d be window shopping all over the place. Or worse, we might end up buying something – maybe a snack or something.

For his visit home, I also stayed in the car. We have to park a block away from their house whenever we visit. That day,¬†I just parked along the main road, hazard lights on. And this was a quick visit because Nanay wasn’t home. So he just said Hey to Tatay, grabbed a few things, and came back.

On the way there we were already talking about where to head next. Robinson’s Magnolia was a good option – so we could buy a bigger thermos to lug cold water with. SM MOA was another option, or behind it rather, at the bay area, because I really wanted to go somewhere we could just hang out. I have been wanting to go to a park, somewhere where we could relax and I could read or crochet for a few hours. I’ve also been wanting to drive to Tagaytay.

It was 12 noon, and he said yes to Tagaytay.

IMG_4248

There are so many dining options in Tagaytay City, but since I’ve never tried it at Mahogany Market, that’s where we went to eat. It’s the Bulalo capital, so they say. I’m happy to report that the Bulalo is just as good as anywhere else in Tagaytay, the fried Tawilis too. Leslie’s and Dencio’s have the advantage of a nice view, but the many stalls at Mahogany Market offer unlimited free senyorita bananas, and even a plate of chilled pineapples! They even offered free coffee after the meal. That was good coffee too, very tasty.

IMG_4247

After lunch, we wondered where to go next. It is summer and even Tagaytay is hot and humid. We didn’t go to the Picnic Grove for fear that there might be a lot of people there. The husband insisted that there were still places along the highway where you could stop, park, and admire the view for free. I didn’t believe him but we went ahead and drove the length of the highway. We spotted the Sales Office of Splendid, and what do you know? There’s free parking, and people were stopping to admire the view. We stopped there for about an hour, for crochet and a nap.

IMG_4252

On the way home we decided to take a different route, not the Sta. Rosa route, but the Alfonso-Silang road. We followed Waze and was again amazed at the good but narrow side streets of Cavite. This province sure has a lot of small bridges. It’s also nice to note how there are many big, beautiful houses tucked away and hidden from the main roads. When we finally got back on the main road, there was the Sunday afternoon traffic – people are heading home to Manila. It wasn’t too bad though, just slow going at some areas.

We decided not to follow Waze at some point and just follow the road to Cavitex. It meant an additional hour of travel, but it was nice and steady. The husband ended up sleeping for the most part, but I would wake him up every ten minutes or so. Haha.

We are definitely not spontaneous people. We usually talk things through a few times before we do anything, that’s why end up not doing much most of the time! Lol. But it’s nice to just do something like an impromptu road trip. Good for the soul. ūüôā

 

How To Be Alone

At the risk of sounding anti-Valentine’s, here’s my Valentine’s Day post.

When you’re¬†happy¬†in your head (and in your heart), alone¬†becomes okay.

I am trying to be okay alone. No, there is nothing wrong in MarriageVille, we are still keeping on. But having different schedules has sometimes meant having to spend a lot of time on my own in the past few months. I haven’t always liked it, I am used to doing things with the hubby and I like it that way. But suddenly today, watching this video shared on the Post Secret Facebook page, I realised that i should also be okay with being alone.

What do I do by myself? I rarely run errands just by myself. Therein lies my biggest dependence on the husband. I drive for him, but he does the legwork. There were two online purchases I needed to say for over the counter at BPI and I got delayed because I wanted to wait for him to do it for me. I haven’t taken my car for a good wash in over a week and a half because I didn’t want to wait by myself. That is just wrong.

But the other day, while the husband was in bed, feeling pain in his joints, I went out by myself to get food and some painkillers. It wasn’t so bad! I did forget to pick up the food I paid for at the drive-thru window, but all in all it was still okay. Yes. I ordered, paid at the first window, and then went right past the second window and out onto the street! I realised my mistake about 10 seconds later and went right back. That was funny.

I tend to do a lot of thinking when I drive alone. That’s a good thing, but it can also mean i tend to be distracted.

In mid-2014 I also did something just by myself for the first time ever – I signed up for a retreat where I didn’t know anybody, and I drove myself to Batangas all by myself.

I like the idea. And I think I should continue working on it. I think it’s not just good for myself, but it would do wonders for my marriage too.

2016: Getting Ready

The past year was the year of the unexpected. In all aspects of my life, I was bent on simply cultivating and deepening relationships, and becoming an even better mentor for my direct reports at work. I was also going to try to be a good wife. A better friend, a more present family member. I was also going to take better care of myself.

But things progressed at work faster than I could ever have imagined. After a wonderful trip to my personal heaven (Sagada) with my Team (and Mr A of course) to close out the first quarter of the year, I immediately had to leave them to build another one. And that kind of took over my life. Or I used it as an excuse not to really work hard on the hundred and one other things I wanted to carry out in 2015.

The good thing is that we are given a clean slate every single day when we wake up. We can do better, we can be better. We can take the lessons from yesterday, tuck the experience under our belt, and start fresh. And start stronger than before.

So that’s what we’re doing this year, Mr A and I. We want to get pregnant, but we know that we’re probably not ready yet. We’re slobs, overweight, and we can be very selfish too. So this year is all about getting ourselves ready to get pregnant. Maybe it will take more than this year before we get the baby we’re praying for, but we’re going to prepare.

Getting Ready - Newbie Wife and Mr A

Getting Ready – Newbie Wife and Mr A

Health and Fitness¬†is a big theme for our year. Mr A is going to try to cook with a little less fat, and a bit more veggies. We are ¬†also trying to move more. He gave me a Fitbit Charge for Christmas to help get me more interested in getting up and around. I want something we could do together but¬†he doesn’t want to do Zumba with a class. Now I don’t think simply signing up with a gym membership will work for us because I think that we’ll need personal trainers and that can get really expensive. So he came up with the idea to do dance lessons instead. I’m not taking him seriously on that though, not until we get into a studio and actually start dancing! So for starters, we just really need to be more active.

Emergency Fund.¬†I wish I could say that it’s the time for investments, but it isn’t yet for us. A year after getting married, we’ve done an okay¬†job keeping our finances in order. We’ve cut down our debts, and we got a new car. We need more security though, specially if we’re to add a wee little baby to this family of three (we got a puppy in October!). ¬†So this year, we’re going to stick to our guns and save more to setup that¬†cushion around us. We’re going to have to be really creative here. Hmm.

Now those are two major areas that we’re concentrating on for now. Of course there are others, like getting better at keeping the house in order and not just for when my parents come home for the weekend. We also need to get a better flow so we can spend quality time despite having very different shifts and days off work. We also need more specific, actionable, and measurable plans. I’m going to have to do my best to write about that. I know that getting things published somehow helps Mr A and I a bit more accountable.

A few months ago, I voiced out how we perhaps needed to find a new common hobby. Years ago we had Photography; and there’s always the love of food, and movies. But we needed a new one we could bond over, and spend meaningful time together for. Talking about getting ready and aligning our goals for the year feels like IT. So maybe this will really work this time around.

From Mr A and I, Happy New Year! For married folks out there, what are your Couple Goals for this year?

 

Not expecting. Yet.

stairs

Have you heard the news? Another December 2014 bride is on the family way. That makes 3 pregnant celebrities who walked down the aisle around the same time that I did.

They are pregnant. Expectant moms. Yay!

I am not.

Are we trying? We said we would. And we said that we would make lifestyle changes so we can really have a fighting chance of having a baby soon. So far, none of what we planned has yet happened. And there is no baby on the way.

Now how do I really feel about it? Every time I hear about another woman my age getting pregnant, I think I worry more about getting asked about when it will be my turn. It’s that more than feeling sad or envious that I am not yet pregnant. I don’t have the right to be sad, or envious. I haven’t done everything to prepare myself and my body for that blessing.

I don’t exercise.

I still eat pretty much anything I want to.

I could be more intentional in how I spend my spare time and more proactive at home.

We haven’t seen a doctor to help us find out what we need to be doing to make sure we can conceive. I have lived with PCOS and hormonal imbalance since college. They say it really won’t be easy given that. We are both obese. But there are people with similar circumstances as ours who don’t have difficulty conceiving.

Why haven’t I/we done any of these? Maybe because I am afraid that after all the time and effort, we’ll find that we still can’t make babies.

So there. That’s how I really feel about it.

%d bloggers like this: