The beginning of November is especially dedicated for remembering loved ones that have gone ahead of us. We visit their graves, bring flowers, light candles, offer them food and prayers.
And we gather ’round with our remaining relatives (and hopefully the family keeps on growing!) to reminisce, and to make new memories.
Today, the 4th of 30 Days of Thankful, I am grateful for having experienced loss.
It’s from having lost people that I love and who have meant so much to me that I have gained a deeper appreciation for those family and friends who still live. And observing All Souls Day is a yearly reminder to take every opportunity to show our living family how much we love and appreciate them. To not waste time, and to recognise the value of each day as the gift that it truly is.
How good are you at recognizing the signs of substance abuse and symptoms of mental disorders in family members? Can you effectively answer how much is too much? Do you know when someone keeps having an extra drink at lunch, or nightcap, beyond what’s recommended? Or has a loved one talked about needing something to help balance them out in order to make it through the day, leaning on that extra little drink or pill? Has buzzed driving gone from just getting home to the second DUI, or that original pain pill prescription becomes a seemingly constant script fix? When there is too much partying or pain management, then it is time to seek some addiction treatment.
These questions are hard enough to answer for ourselves, let alone for a loved one. These are all reasons, and rightfully so, for additional concern.
Oftentimes, addiction may not be the only problem. There may be an underlying mental health issue as well. Fortunately, there are treatment options available to families with someone suffering from a co-occurring disorder. In fact, if the affected individual has health insurance, it might be possible for them to access free detox solutions going forward.
You have to do your best to figure out whether there are any mental disorders, substance abuse or both in order to seek out a drug rehab center for treatment. For effective recovery, underlying issues (including mental health) have to be addressed as well.
Wellness starts with admitting there is a problem. Your loved one has to recognize this in order for treatment to help. Be prepared for resistance from that person, including outright denial of a problem existing. This is true whether they’re dealing with depression, bipolar disorder, alcoholism, narcotics addiction, etc.
Having adequate health insurance is a big portion of getting well, both mentally and physically. Without good health insurance or the means to pay outright, your treatment can be subpar or non-existent at all if some health institution refuses to treat you.
Also, the path from recognizing a substance abuse issue to sobriety is not usually a straightforward one, like a ‘walk-in-the-park.’ Often, it is more like Dorothy starting on that path to Oz, you have to put one foot in front of the other. There may be some stops, getting off on the wrong track even, or other unexpected detours. But you may also meet some people along the way who take care to be vested in you and your loved one’s well-being and who want to see you do well.
Sobriety is an every minute of every day, of every month, of every year thing. Falling off the wagon happens. But the most successful treatments look at the reasoning behind why you fell off the wagon and then gives you the tools and assistance and resources to help manage these detracting situations. These problem management tools become part of your arsenal in order to hopefully build another string of days, weeks, months and years of success successful sobriety. The same is true with the mental health portion of treatment.
Not long after you get married, there’s this unspoken pressure to conceive. Your parents are anxious to have grandchildren, your friends are waiting for you to join “the mommy club”, and obviously, this is something you and your spouse had planned long before tying the knot. Now that the bliss of the wedding has passed and reality has sunk in, it seems like you’re on a clock to get knocked up within the next year. When months go by and nothing happens, the stress, anxiety, and pressure can be enough to send you into depression.
“Why is it taking so long for us to get pregnant?”
“How can I get my family and friends off my back?”
“Everyone around us is having children without a problem, is there something wrong with us?”
“Am I not trying hard enough?”
There are a lot of thoughts running through your head and with each passing month that you’re not pregnant these feelings get harder and harder to push aside. What was once an exciting journey towards starting a family with the love of your life has turned into a nightmare that you don’t know how to escape.
Could it Be Depression?
How do you know if you’re battling depression and not simply a bit down about not being pregnant despite your best efforts to conceive? There are different types of depression, each with its own set of symptoms, causes, and treatment. However, if you’re suffering from mental illness as a result of trying to have a baby, you may notice the following physical, emotional, and behavioral signs:
Lack of energy and exhaustion
Difficulties sleeping
Loss or increased appetite
Low libido
Social withdrawal
Restlessness
Mood swings
Not wanting to get up
Lack of motivation
Constant sadness and feelings of misery and despair
Helplessness
Anxiety
Numbness
Low self-esteem
Loss of the enjoyment of life
Self-doubt
Lack of focus
Thoughts of suicide
What Should You Do?
If you’ve experienced a number of these symptoms over a long period of time, chances are you’re depressed about the process of trying to get pregnant or the thought that your dreams of pregnancy may never happen. Either way, you should know that getting pregnant will not make your depression go away. It is making changes and seeking help (especially if you’re suicidal) that help to resolve the matter. Here are a few suggestions on what you might do to start turning things around:
Don’t get ahead of yourself – Just because you’re not expecting yet doesn’t mean you can’t get pregnant. Unless you’ve heard a clear diagnosis from a doctor, you shouldn’t allow the assumption of infertility to get you down. In fact, paying a visit to the doctor can help you understand what you may be dealing with.
Keep a journal – it is human nature to be upset when things don’t go according to plan. Keeping a journal can help you to get these pent up emotions out.
Find something else to focus on – many couples have reported that they tried for years to get pregnant with no luck. However, after putting their mind elsewhere they were able to get pregnant right away. Perhaps you’re too focused on trying to conceive and it’s stressing you out.
Stop planning it – if you and your spouse are reduced to having timed sex during you ovulation periods then maybe it’s time to take a break from the planned sex. Enjoy your partner intimately for the fun of it and whatever happens, happens.
Talk to someone – if you’ve reached the point where all you can think about is getting pregnant and it’s causing you to feel depressed you should talk to someone. A counselor, for instance, can help you to understand that you’re not alone. They may also be able to help you develop positive behaviors that can heal your mind.
Having children is something that most couples want some day. What many don’t realize until they’re actually ready to have kids is that it doesn’t always go according to plan. On your journey to parenthood, it is important not to put so much pressure on yourself or to let the outside world put pressure on you. Do what you know is necessary like eating right, exercising, and getting plenty of rest and leave the rest up to chance. If you’re really stressed about the ordeal the next most effective solution is to get help. Don’t let depression take away what is supposed to be some of the most fun moments in your life.
Being a parent to a dog is pretty rewarding for most parts. However, there are certain challenges almost all veteran pet parents can relate to. Without offering any solutions whatsoever, here’re 9 real-world challenges only dog parents can fully understand.
Social Media Feeds Bombarded with Advertisements of Pet Products:
Ordering pets medical supplies and other doggie products on the internet directs a swarm of targeted ads. Your social media pages and Amazon suggestion lists are nothing but an endless gallery of pet products.
Dog Fur on Clothes Is an Inevitable Truth of Life:
What used to annoy you before now has become a truth that you have learned to live with. You have grown used to plucking out pieces of your pet from your clothes while at the office.
Planning an All-Nighter with Friends Is as Plausible as Going Unicorn Shopping:
Even if there is someone at home to take care of your dog, you imagine your pet waiting patiently at the door for you to arrive. This very thought keeps you from participating in stayovers and all-night parties.
Constantly Trying to Avoid Saying Certain Trigger Words:
“Okay, Max I know I said car, but we are not going out right now, alright!” Sounds familiar? As a seasoned pet mommy or daddy, you know what words you should never say when your dog is listening. When you say “outside” you better mean it.
Waking up at Night Realizing You Are Cramped for Space:
Did you ever wake up hugging the edge of the bed while your dog is all stretched out bang in the middle? It happens, it’s just something you have to live with.
Realizing Your Dog Is the King/Queen of Facial Manipulation:
“Give Me the Biscuit!” That’s exactly what your dog is thinking when it makes those cute faces and tilts its head ever so slightly. What’s worse is that you fall for it every single time.
Apologizing to People Because for Your Dog’s Obnoxiously Warm Welcomes:
Your dog knows how to stage a welcome. As long as you have a dog in your house you would never have to worry about your guests feeling unwelcome. The only problem, they sometimes may feel awkward when your dog jump-kisses them in their mouths. You have no choice other than sincerely apologizing and handing out towels.
The Realization After Giving Your Dog a Bath That You Forgot the Towel:
This happens more than you would like to admit. The worst thing is you only realize it after you and your dog is completely wet inside a towel-less bathroom. If somehow your dog manages a wet escape, you have no choice but to bring out the mop.
Your Pant Pockets Have Become Permanent Storage Units for Poop Bags:
Occasionally, when you put your hand inside your jeans pocket, out comes old receipts and a bouquet of unused poop bags. Your pant pockets have become a buffer storage unit for these bags.
Tantrums and Meltdowns in Kids | Stitches & Words http://verabear.net
Is Your Toddler Having a Tantrum or Suffering from Sensory Processing Disorder?
Do you have a child who seems to act out all the time? Perhaps you chalked it up to a temper tantrum, common behavior for toddlers. Has their behavior has become not only disruptive and embarrassing but potentially harmful and frequent? Though this could very well be nothing more than your tiny tot trying to find their voice and express their emotions, it is also a real possibility that they’re suffering from something else.
Tantrums and emotional meltdowns as a result of sensory processing disorder or lack of self-control may appear to be the same, however, they are very different from each other. Having a clear understanding of these differences can help you learn how to parent in a manner in which supports your child’s growth and development.
What’s a Tantrum?
A tantrum is an emotional outburst that children display when trying to communicate their needs or wants. You might notice this occur if you’re paying attention to your phone and your kid wants your attention, or when they can’t have a treat or play with a toy. A tantrum can manifest through screaming, kicking, crying, and lashing out. They may not be able to fully express themselves in these scenarios and may have a valid reason for trying to communicate with you, however, a toddler who is catching tantrums is on some level able to control their emotions and behavior. You can tell because when provided with what they want, they’re able to quickly stop their negative behavior.
What’s a Meltdown?
Meltdowns are emotional outbursts as a result of feeling overwhelmed. For children suffering from a sensory processing disorder, their meltdowns essentially mean that there’s too much information to be processed. They might start screaming in a crowded grocery store because of all the commotion and bright lights. They may kick and yell to take off their clothes if the seams are causing irritation. In these circumstances, they’re unable to control their responses to feeling overwhelmed. Unlike a tantrum that is often resolved by getting a response, a meltdown can continue to occur even after giving the child what they want or removing them from an environment they’re overly sensitive to.
How to Deal with Tantrums and Meltdowns
Now having a clear understanding of the differences between a tantrum and a meltdown, you can make more effective decisions as a parent. How can you prevent or minimize the likelihood of them occurring? If they do occur, what should your response be? Below are some answers:
Tantrums – To deal with a child who’s catching a tantrum, it is imperative that you don’t give in to what they’re asking for. This reinforces their behavior and makes it harder to stop the next time. Instead, acknowledge their feelings, express to them a better way to communicate with you, and then after they’ve corrected their behavior if you want you can provide them with whatever it is they’re after.
Meltdowns – If your child suffers from meltdowns due to sensory processing disorder the best thing you can do is either remove the triggers or remove them from environments that overstimulate the senses. If they cry every time they have to get dressed you would seamless sensitivity products to soothe their frustrations. If you’re in a crowded space, try to get somewhere you can be alone and help your child to calm down and refocus.
Tantrums are negative displays of emotion to get what they want or need. Meltdowns are often uncontrollable emotional responses to overly stimulating environments or circumstances. Knowing the difference between the two is imperative to your child’s growth and development. It also helps you to understand them in a way that helps you to be a more effective parent. If your child continues to have tantrums and meltdowns, you may want to check with their pediatrician to ensure they don’t have any other developmental issues that could be causing the behavior.
